Last Stand

I spoke at length in the last post about the kind of crossroads I’ve just arrived at, but I’m still only now realizing the full gravity of the situation…quite literally because it’s been weighing me down. I guess not in a bad way, but in a thoughtful, forward-looking way.

It looks as if my life boils down to these next few weeks. Fourteen some-odd weeks more of learning the ropes, and by the end of it all I better damn well be able to climb. After school comes an internship, and after the internship…who knows? Once again that question comes to mind: “will I be ready?”

There are still a million things I can picture myself doing in this field, and I’m still not sure if at this point that’s a good thing or a bad thing.

If I wanna narrow down my focus, the main thing I should worry about is simply finishing up, getting through the last semester. This is it, this is where the road ends and like I said in my last post I’ve come too far to turn back now.

My purpose is to conquer this term in style, buckle down, straighten up and fly right. Not that my lust for nocturnal activity effected me too much last term (in fact I walked away with a 3.8 overall GPA) but it just seems that in preparation for my lot in life I should make some changes: stay more on the ball, read more, get to sleep at a decent hour if I’ve got an early next morning. I’m breaking that last rule as I type this very blog. According to my new rule I’m meant to get all my shit together at 11PM and be in dreamland by midnight. I think It’s a good rule and I’m gonna try to stick to it over the course of the semester if I can. On the bright side: I HAVE been reading more and I already feel more intelligent because of it. Not to mention that today was my first day of class and I got my first small assignment for homework and I plowed through it tonight so I don’t have to worry about another assignment in the class for two weeks.

So this is it, this is the last stand. It’s been five long years; I DO NOT want to go back to school after this.

Tonight, before crawling under my covers and beginning to write this post I put something on my whiteboard…


And there it is, just a gentle reminder of where I am…and where I’m headed. I hope it’s somewhere great…I really, really do.

Peace and love,
Joe